Nick Cannon has worn many hats over the course of his profession — he’s been a comic, rapper, tv host, actor, and entrepreneur.
However as of late, most discussions in regards to the 42-year-old have much less to do together with his prodigious abilities than together with his bed room actions.
As you’re seemingly conscious, Cannon has fathered 12 youngsters by 5 totally different ladies.
Which is why it’s so stunning that Nick has now signed an endorsement take care of Durex, a British producer of condoms and private lubricants.
Sources who’ve seen Cannon’s first Durex business say that it finds the entertainer wearing Napoleonic garb on a battlefield.
The visible pun on his final identify is, after all, self-explanatory,
“When using into battle, nothing is extra necessary than a person’s armor,” Nick says to the digicam.
“The identical is true for a person who’s seeking to fireplace off his cannon with out repercussions,” he continues.
“Don’t get me improper — constructing a military is a rewarding expertise. However there comes a time when a person has extra troops than he can handle.”
At that time, Nick rips off the soldier getup, dons one among his trademark turbans, and strides onto a set made to seem like a classy cocktail lounge.
He’s flanked by two ladies who stare upon him as if they’d fortunately assist him welcome a pair new Cannons into the world.
“Fellas, I’m not a normal,” Nick earnestly explains to his viewers.
“However I’m a father of 12, which implies I do know a factor or two about accountability. And the factor about accountability is — most males don’t have it,” he continues.
“Particularly these days! Y’all zoomers wouldn’t even know the best way to maintain a digital pet alive! I’ll pause and provide you with time to google ‘digital pet.’”
Right here, Nick sips his drink and chats up the fashions for a second.
“So in the event you can’t keep in mind to feed your Tamagotchi, then you definitely’re not able to be a father. I do know what you’re considering — Nick what makes you so particular you could have as many children as you need?” he asks rhetorically.
“Properly, right here’s your reply: I. Am. Wealthy! Hella wealthy. I had my first infants with Mariah Carey. These children are so wealthy they have already got flights booked on Elon’s first flight to Mars!”
“In the event you’re a millionaire like me, then go nuts! Breed like a Duggar! But when not …”
Right here, Nick pauses earlier than delivering the slogan of the marketing campaign:
“Don’t be like Nick! Wrap … up an necessary dialog about household planning previous to intercourse. You’ll be glad you probably did!”
Sigh. Sadly, this text is simply an April Fools’ joke, however Cannon as a condom spokesman form of works, proper?
Hey, Nick, in the event you wind up making a take care of Trojan, we wish a lower, bro!