In relationships, being susceptible is the act of exhibiting somebody precisely who you might be and the way you’re feeling with out disguise, bravado, or ego defenses, exposing your self to the potential for harm or rejection.

“Being susceptible means we make a aware determination to not cover ourselves,” explains licensed {couples} therapist Alicia Muñoz, LPC. “That is dangerous as a result of we will not management how others will reply to us. It means others see who we actually are, and if they don’t seem to be in a position to take us in, or recognize our complexity, and so they decide or reject us, it hurts deeply.”

To assist perceive what vulnerability appears to be like like in follow, Muñoz gives the instance of how infants deal with feelings:

“Being susceptible with somebody means risking being your true self. For infants, that is straightforward. They’re effortlessly themselves. They really feel unhappy and so they cry. They really feel comfortable and so they smile. They expertise ache and so they flinch, gasp, or whimper. They’re afraid and so they search soothing and luxury. Infants have not but realized to cover themselves or what they really feel. As our brains get extra refined, and we expertise losses and disappointments, and develop a way of ourselves as separate from others, we be taught to current ourselves to the world the best way we wish to be perceived. We be taught to cover ourselves. After we really feel unhappy, we chortle. After we really feel scared, we act detached. After we really feel jealous, we inform individuals we’re comfortable for them.”

As Muñoz factors out, individuals start to wrestle with vulnerability as a result of they worry getting harm—sometimes within the type of different individuals’s rejection, judgment, or betrayal. We could start to placed on a courageous face, act detached, suppress feelings, or step into a task meant to guard ourselves from these dangers.

“The irony is, after we do that, we find yourself robbing ourselves of the intimacy, connection, neighborhood, and love of the individuals who have the bandwidth and capability to take us in as we’re,” she says.